Why I Wrote My Book
Hey everyone!! I hope you all had a wonderful Easter weekend!! Easter to me is one of my favorite holidays because of what it stands for but also because of when it happens ... in Spring! It is such a happy time of year! I absolutely love spring and all the flowers and new life and hope that comes with spring!! Easter is made that much more special because of when it takes place! So I hope you all enjoyed the glorious Easter weekend!!
I missed last week posting a blog as we had a lot of announcements with the Hall Sisters and also the date of when my book will be released. So I thought I would write a quick blog as to why I wrote my book! For those of you who may have missed the announcements, The Hall Sisters will be on Huckabee, and we will be releasing our new album AND my book all on the same day ... April 16th!! We are super excited!! And in case you missed it, my book and our album are both available for pre-sale. If you are interested in pre-ordering my book just click the link here Nothing To Lose But Everything To Gain and if you are interested in pre-ordering our album click here Here and the Other Side.
Ok, so first off I want to share with you how my book came into being. It all happened in the early summer of 2016 when I was coming back home after being on a walk. I was on my way home when all of a sudden I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. It was like I heard God tell me to go home and start writing about my life. I was so excited that I couldn't wait to get home! As soon as I got home I was off! I started writing and writing. Sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night and continue on writing. I couldn't write fast enough.
It was funny though, because half of my book takes place during the years 2017-2020. That’s half of my book. So what I was writing was only the first half of my book. Throughout those years I would have to keep adding endings to my book because each year held its own chapter of struggles. I would get so discouraged and sometimes when I would go and write I knew as soon as I was done writing I would have a relapse with food. Or I would go and eat a lot of food.
I think the reason being, I was having to keep adding endings to my book which meant I wasn’t “done” with my eating disorder. I was so sick of fighting. I had been fighting my eating disorder for years! I was sick of it! And writing is expressing emotion and having to relive scars and memories and so emotionally it was hard and taxing. Sometimes I would just go and cry after writing more in my book. So when I would finish up writing, a lot of times I would go to food to help numb my pain and hurt.
I almost forgot, but I had almost gotten my book published in 2019. I got as far as just needing to sign the contract with a publishing agency and off it would have gone and it would have been published. But it wasn’t time. My dad told me no. It wasn’t the right time because I still had a chapter left in my life that I needed to live out so that it could go in the book.
It wasn’t till 2020 during quarantine. I knew this was the perfect time to start writing. I had come to a point in my recovery where I knew my eating disorder was gone. I was still recovering but that presence of my eating disorder was gone. How do I know? Well I’ve said it before but when you have lived with an eating disorder for most of your life ... you better believe I knew when the presence of it was gone. I felt the absence. I knew it was gone. Did I struggle? Yes! I still have my struggles but it isn’t an eating disorder and there is a big difference. I talk a little bit about it in this blog I wrote here ... Physical Recovery.
Anyways, I decided last year that I would start all over with my book. Yep. Aaaaallllll over. I went and started at the top and went through the whole thing reworking and rewriting my book. I would send my parents my book in thirds and they would read it and help give some advice. But I knew I needed an editor. But who? We didn’t know anyone.
Well it was so cool cause God gave me an editor! My dad had a patient come in with a book she had written and dad had shared that I was writing a book. So she gave my dad the info of who the editor was. I decided to reach out and just see if she would be willing to edit my book! You see, I had tried several other editors and always came up empty handed. Well, I wrote this editor and she was so nice but I just didn’t think it would be a fit. So I was like, ok that’s from the Lord. We will just keep waiting. I kept praying and praying.
It wasn't till one week we were in Nashville recording our new album that I got this email from the same editor I had been in contact with. She said she was going to be starting a new business with her dad who was an editor in his early days but wanted to come back to editing. She said they were going to go into this together and she thought that I would be a perfect fit for them. I just knew this was from the Lord and I knew this was it! These two people were the people God wanted me to use to edit my book! I absolutely LOVED working with them. They were and are an incredible team! It was just so encouraging and amazing how God worked this out!
Now, I want to share with you why I wrote my book. I wanted to write this book because I knew that food is something so many people struggle with. Did you know that one person dies every hour from an eating disorder? Did you know that eating disorders are the deadliest mental disorder? And that anorexia is linked to the highest mortality rate amongst eating disorders? Did you know that it is estimated that 30 million Americans struggle with eating disorders and 10 million of them are men?
Eating disorders is something that so many people struggle with. I have always been vocal about my eating disorder when technically that is not very normal. Most people want to keep their eating disorder secret. They don’t want others to know. Half of the battle is being willing to tell someone that you struggle. Satan loves keeping it in the dark and for eating disorders he makes it really easy to keep it hidden. But as soon as you are able to at least start talking to someone about it or admitting that you struggle with food ... Satan loses major ground. So I wanted to write my book to be a mouthpiece for the struggle I went through with eating disorders. I was diagnosed officially from anorexia but I was never diagnosed officially for bulimia. So I really think for three years I struggled with bulimia and Binge Eating Disorder (BED).
All that to say, I have been through the gambit with eating disorders, I know how hard it is to fight and how impossible it feels to recover. So with my book I want to give people hope and courage that it is possible to recover ... 100%! My book is filled with stories from my life all the way from the beginning. I truly believe God took me through bulimia and BED so that He could help give me an understanding from both sides of an eating disorder. Of course He used it for many more purposes ... but you'll just have to get the book to see how!
My book is truly a book about my journey and my life and how I got to anorexia, to bulimia/BED to recovery. I have a different take on what recovery looks like compared to what others may say. But I know for a fact the key to recovery and if you are interested ... you will just have to pre-order my book!
I truly hope my book gives people hope, encouragement and determination to not give up this fight. I know it’s exhausting and wearisome and feels impossible ... but it’s not. Because here I am to prove it! If I can recover ... you can. And not just temporarily recover ... no. You can live life never fearing going back into your eating disorders’ grip. I don’t live in that fear. With my recovery I know it’s gone and gone for good. So you too can have Everlasting Recovery! :)
~ Natalie