An Honest Update

I feel like it has been ages since I last posted! Goodness, it has been quite busy around here and it's about to get even busier!! But that's a good thing and I am quite thankful for this season of life! I thought I’d just share a little bit of what has been going on with me and just fill y’all in with what I’ve been up to and what I have coming down the road and what God has been showing me lately!

First off, I just got back from our March tour, which took us to five different states in three weeks! We went to Iowa, Nebraska, South Dakota, Colorado, and Kansas! It was a great tour! We met a lot of sweet people, saw a lot of land and got to go horseback riding in CO, which has been on my bucket list for like … forever! There was sooooo much good and God was so faithful on this tour! I’d be lying if I said it was all good though. I like being real with people and if I'm honest - parts of the tour were pretty hard and difficult … but that's to be expected! Nothing comes easy in life! I’ll explain a little bit more later on in this blog. But all in all, it was a beautiful March tour filled with many new memories! 

Since we have been home, we have had to quickly switch gears and start getting everything ready because in about two weeks we will be heading to Dollywood to sing for seven weeks!! Ah, I'm so excited!! We did that last year and some of my best memories of 2022 came from performing at Dollywood! It truly is such a privilege to be able to be a part of the park during the "Food and Flower Festival". No matter if you're there as a worker or a participant, Dollywood is like a big, happy family that has high standards, knows how to have fun and knows how to bring everyone together. And to be a part of that family for the spring is truly such a gift! So I am very excited to be able to go back!

Now, for an honest update with where I’m at. 

A couple months ago I posted a blog titled “What Spurs You On?”. If you read it you may remember, but for those who didn’t, I mentioned how God was taking me through some things that have been unexpected and earth shattering to me. It has rocked my world and been extremely hard for me. I am not at liberty to say exactly what it is but I can say it doesn't have to deal with food. But in that blog I mentioned how because God was taking me through this unexpected thing in life I went to food to help comfort and numb the situation. I am happy to report that three months later, I have actually done quite well with food. 

God has taken me on this unexpected journey that I wasn't prepared to go on. But He has used this journey to help me and show Himself to me in various ways. He has used this to sure-up where I go when things get hard in life. I (obviously) used to go to food a lot in the past, I have not done that much throughout this journey. Because I really know that food will not satisfy me and it won’t soothe my pain. It may numb for a short period of time but it never lasts. And when you wake up from that numbness you feel even more pain. God has been showing me that only He can heal this pain and fill that void. 

I have been thankful, humbled and proud at some of the victories along the way because myself three years ago would not have been able to go through this journey without food. Remember: rejoice in the victories ... no matter how small!! They are worth rejoicing in!! 

I truly have learned a lot and have even healed from my food struggle through this current journey. He’s helped heal me with things that I didn't even know needed healing! I have been so thankful for what God has shown me and that He has helped keep me stable on the food side of things. But because food has become easier … other things/vices in life have gotten harder, which is to be expected.

Quick disclaimer: For me, something that is earth shattering for my little world is nothing compared to what other people have had to go through. Other people have it so much harder and have gone through so many worse things that would make my little “hard time of life” look like a walk in the park compared to what they're going through. I say that not to take away from the pain I have gone through but to just point out that we all have things that are excruciating for us to go through and it looks different for every single person. It also validates what you may go through or are going through. It all looks different but it doesn't take away from how you feel as an individual. And it also helps so that we don't judge others for what they’re going through as well.

With that being said, this season of life has been hard for me and like I said, it has rocked my foundation. As hard as it’s been, God has been teaching me so very much through it. As I said earlier, He has shown me Himself, He has shown me deeper levels of my sin and He has used this to strengthen me even though it has broken me. I’m not gonna lie … as I am typing I am trying to remind myself of the good that has come from this and remind myself to keep going. To not give up. To not run to the things of this world to satisfy or to drown out my pain. Just because it’s been easier for me not to run to food lately, it doesn't mean I am not tempted to run to other vices to help numb my pain. 

I have been fighting constantly to not go to things to numb my pain. I have won some victories and have certainly lost some battles. But all in all God has been teaching me through this season. I wish I could say I know how this is all gonna turn out … but I can’t. I have no idea what God has in store. But! I know … even though I don’t feel it … I know that I want His will above mine. I do not want to get in the way of what He wants because I know that His will is best. His will is always best and that doesn't change … no matter the outcome. So I am fighting to trust Him in this. 

And that my friends is my honest update. Even though I am going through this season I am still excited to see what God is doing and going to do! And I am extremely excited for our upcoming time at Dollywood!!

Because of Dollywood this will probably be my last blog till sometime in the summer. So until then I thought I would share the link to the page on this website that has my earliest blogs. That way, while I'm away and if you have time and want to check them out, you can! That is if you haven’t already or if you’re new here! So just click here and it will take you to that first page … only if you want to! ;) 

Well I hope you all have a wonderful and glorious Easter! Remember, because He loves you and me so much, He conquered the grave and rose again as the Son of Man and as the Son of God. He did that so you and I, no matter what happens in this life can have His HOPE, we can have His PEACE and we can have His JOY!!! What a blessing and a miracle!! Happy Easter everyone!!

~ Natalie